“And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through Him.”Colossians 3:17
My senior year of college I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life. Not an ideal time to realize that.
College had been fun, and I’d learned a lot in my almost useless Liberal Arts degree, but somehow I forgot to actually figure out what to do next. Since school seemed like a safe option for someone who didn’t know what to actually do, I decided not to mess with a good thing, and went to graduate school.
My grad school experience was not BAD, but I found myself slipping into depression because simply put, I didn’t know what to do with my life. I felt aimless, isolated, uprooted from my community and my home, and not fulfilled by my studies. I couldn’t see a future where I was, so I decided to drop out, move back home. I had truly embraced what I was afraid was possible: failure.
I remember at one point realizing, I’d never even prayed about this decision to go to grad school. I tried to reason, justify, think that it was the best plan, a great opportunity, a growing experience. In reality, all of these things were probably true. But maybe they were not true for me.
I’d stopped doing things in the name of the Lord. I was doing it for myself, to feel like I was a success, and when I failed, I was miserable.
Thankfully, I don’t believe God cares if you are successful in the eyes of the world. Success is relative. As long as you are content in your path, as long as you are doing it to put good into the world, you are a success in the eyes of the only One who matters.
Father, thank you that in your eyes, I am never a failure. You truly are a good Father in that you look past what the world sees, and love me and have a plan for my life. Thank you.